Walmart = God


This image was one of the first things to greet me upon my move to New York City this past August.  I had been having a hard time emotionally adjusting to the move, but this was the straw that broke the camel’s back.  After seeing it, I wasn’t sure I could survive in New York, or that I even wanted to.  I just couldn’t understand; I mean, what the hell is wrongwith these people??!

What is that devestating, life-changing image, you might ask? Well, that is the image you will see if you try to google map “Walmart NYC.”  Notice something missing?  Oh right….there are none!

I hail from the heart of the Walmart empire.  It’s been a huge part of my life since the day I was born.  You need diapers?  Walmart.  Food?  Walmart.  Toys, games, electronics, furniture, music, books, art, accessories, dishes, appliances, crafts, paint, auto stuff, gardening stuff, holiday stuff, decor, jewelry, fish, or anything else ever made under the sun in the history of mankind?  Walmart.  And the best part?  It’s cheap.

Yeah sure, Walmart treats its employees like crap, but they knew what they were getting into when they applied.  Walmart is a business, and business is about making money.  If they can do that without having to treat their employees well, and the employees just sit back and take it instead of finding other jobs and forcing Walmart to be humane, more power to them. Harsh? Maybe, but that’s business, and that’s life.

I don’t understand why New Yorkers are so against Walmart.  I suppose it’s because they’re fans of all these “Mom and Pop” shops, and Walmart would make those obsolete just as Borders and Barnes&Noble have made small bookstores disappear.  But that’s what capitalism is all about. The strong survive while the weak are weeded out.  And Walmart is definitely at the top of the food-chain.

I’ve resigned myself to the fact that I will never live to see the day a Walmart opens in NYC.  I take solace that in just a couple years I will be back within the borders of the regime, happy as a clam as I “Save money. Live better” once more.  For now I will have to subsist on trips to the Target in Brooklyn and the Kmart in Penn Station.  These Walmart wannabes have nothing on the real thing, but they’re the closest thing I have, and for that I shall hold them close to my heart and cherish them forever.


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