Oh the people you meet on the train….

One can never be sure what exactly to expect when they step on the train in the morning. Most of the time, it’s an average, non-eventful ride. But sometimes you happen to be surrounded by some very….interesting people.

This morning, for example, I got on the W train as I always do, and took the nearest empty seat, which happened to be next to a guy on a cell phone. Oh, the things you can learn from hearing one side of a conversation…

This guy was a little distraught, and I soon learned why. Apparently, he had been busted by the police for selling drugs and was trying to figure out how to get charged only with possession, and not with selling, even though an undercover cop saw him take money from a girl, wall away, and come back with a small packet of drugs. His argument was that since the money wasn’t on him when he was busted, it didn’t matter what they saw…..oh, and his biggest fear was that his mother would find out…

I thought it would end there, but it got better. He saw a person walk inbetween the subway cars and started going on about how he had been arrested for doing that because he was a felon, and apparently the police department sent him the letter from the MTA urging all officers to arrest any felons breaking MTA rules. He was so indignant that the MTA didn’t want felons on the trains. Gee, I wonder why that is….

Then he changed the topic to his protoge’s family. He started bad mouthing one sister who was 5’4″ and nearly 300 pounds who kept popping out kids, then, out of nowhere, he practically shouts “omg dude! One of the sisters is a dude now! No fucking joke!”. So he spends the next 5-6 minutes going on and on about how she should have stayed a lesbian even though she was an “ugly cunt” and how you just “can’t put a dick on a chick,” and how he almost spit in her face and laughed when he saw her. Then he proceeded to make fun of the mentally ill mother of the three kids (his protoge, the overweight girl, and the tranny). Yeah, it was a real class act I was sitting next to. I can’t even imagine what the conversation would have turned to if we hadn’t entered the tunnel at that time.

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