Jealous? Please.

I was looking back through my message history on fb to see if there was anything worth copying to gmail.  You know, timeless conversations that you want to remember forever.  Well, I saw a message from this girl I used to be friends with who liked to talk about people who judged her and how they “were just jealous” because apparently she “only judged people she was secretly jealous of, because if she wasn’t jealous, it wasn’t worth judging.”  I tend to disagree.

See, I hate being judged out loud.  People can think what they want, but they should keep it to themselves because I really don’t care about their opinion.  I, like every other human being on the planet, do this silent judging.  And let me tell you, it’s not because I’m jealous.  Oh sure, some of the people I judge, I do judge partially out of jealousy.  Like the trust fund kids.  On the one hand, I wouldn’t want to be a spoiled brat like many of them are, but on the other, who wouldn’t want to have the access to money and privilege that they have?  But I usually judge people because I honestly think they’re idiots or sl*ts or whatever it is that I’m judging them for.  I mean, according to this person’s logic, I’m actually incredibly jealous of JChin because of how much I judge her, when the truth is that I would never want her life.  If it works for her (which it rarely seems to), great, but I know I could never be happy.

I also saw a comment on wordpress by AC basically professing the same thing—that people judge because they’re jealous.  But, she also said that the more secular someone is, the more judgmental they are.  I don’t think that’s accurate—as an anti-theist, I do judge religious people quite often—and get judged just as often—but not all secular people do.  In fact, most of them are quite indifferent towards religion, save for when religious nutjobs try to force their views on everyone else.  And I’m not judging because I’m jealous.  I find religion to be completely silly, to put it nicely.  Sure, I bet it’s nice to have a little security blanket that tells you it knows the answers to everything in the world, but I’d rather admit that we do not, and will not ever, know everything, and that does not mean that some invisible guy in the sky did it.  Idk, I guess this is just one of my many pet-peeves with religion—that people who have it often assume that those who don’t must be miserable and jealous, when most of us couldn’t be happier.

Of course, there’s also the argument of ‘why judge unless you care?’  The simple answer: why not?  Humans are social creatures, and gossiping is a crucial part of our lives.  And while some gossip is just passing on news, most of it involves judging others and talking about what you like/don’t like about them and their decisions.  It’s hard wired into us, especially when we have to deal with the people we judge on a daily basis.  It’s easy not to judge someone you barely know and rarely see, but it’s much harder not to judge someone you see all the time when some of their decisions/morals are seriously in conflict with your own.

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